Food re-introduction setback

Written by tonya on June 18th, 2009

We began re-introducing egg into our kids’ diet this past week. Charming Boy quickly sprouted a skin rash on his face and the backs of his upper arms. This is the reaction he formerly showed for the casein (dairy) allergy.

Very upsetting. He has professed his undying love of eggs, and will be crushed if we have to take him off of them again. This was not something I expected, and I need to figure out what we are going to do now.

One idea is to see if I can find a pediatric acupuncturist nearby, one that will use the little beads under a band-aid instead of needles. A couple of friends have had very good results with this type of treatment.

We are also going to ask the ped about getting a traditional skin allergy test for both kids, though from what I’ve read, the false-positive rate is about 50%, whereas a negative reading is about 95% certain. The serum test from last fall that C.B. had the highest possible IgE reaction to eggs and the protein in all glutenous grains, followed by high reactions to casein. From what I understand, IgG is more of an anaphylactic, life-threatening reaction, while the IgE is more of a skin/lungs/digestive tract reaction; it is therefore not much of a coincidence that C.B. tends to have skin rashes, croup, loose stools, and had reflux (digestive tract issues) his first year of life.

I had hoped that 10 months on a completely egg-free, casein-free diet would have allowed his body to heal enough to tolerate these foods again.

I had really been hoping to have our family back on a normal diet by early summer. My mind is overflowing with expletives!! Time to re-evaluate.

WWYD? If the skin reaction was the only obvious sign to an allergen, would you pull it out of the diet again? Is the obvious culinary pleasure he showed with the food worth the skin rash? I can’t believe I’m seriously on the fence about this.

Upheaval

Written by tonya on June 16th, 2009

One of our favorite preschool teachers had her last day at school on Friday, and was heading home to Iran to visit. I was worried that she might have been caught up all the chaos that Tehran has been experiencing since Saturday, so I called her to leave a message.

Fortunately, she has not left the states yet, so I was able to talk with her. She said that due to the forced cell phone outages, she was not able to get through to her parents for three days to make sure they were safe (they are). She said she is not worried about returning home during a potential revolution, as she participated in demonstrations and events previously, so it’s not that scary to her. Cell phone calls are being limited to five minutes.

When I asked for her perception of the government corruption that is being exposed during this election cycle, she said that the election results were announced a mere two hours after the polls closed, and that the ballots had all been hand-written; there was no way all the votes could have been counted! One of the candidates was announced to have zero votes in his favor, which that candidate immediately protested because he knows that he voted for himself!

One other sign of blantant corruption: she said the “election results” were forwarded to an “official” source, saying “this is what we are going to announce” even before the votes could have been counted.

Iranian protesters are hoping the U.N. will step in to help, but she had no idea if or when that would happen.

Another friend alerted me that the best way to stay tuned to what’s really happening is to monitor Twitter feeds coming out of Iran (search on #iranelection). The pictures and stories I’ve seen pouring out of that country are quite astonishing. I also applaud YouTube for leaving up videos uploaded by protesters in an attempt to preserve “their documentary value.”

While it remains unclear if this situation will turn into the political revolution many have hoped for, I do pray for our friend’s safety and for those that seek a true reporting of the actual election results.

Diet dreams dissipate

Written by tonya on June 10th, 2009

We started the food allergy diagnosis saga back in August 2008. Both kids have been on pretty restrictive diets since the beginning of September (no wheat, gluten, dairy/casein, or eggs; each child also had individual sensitivity to random stuff like almonds, peanuts, coconut, green bell peppers, and more).

We have completed one round of antibiotic treatments for intestinal parasites and one long round (three to four weeks) of antifungals for the colonized yeast infections. The kids each received four sets of supplements per day (two rounds of probiotics, two of vitamins and omega 3s and other customized supplements). It took me at least an hour per week to pre-measure everything into individual little plastic lidded containers (my sanity saver, instead of spending a half-hour each day doling out the same stuff over and over), in addition to the time spend mixing each supplement and following the dosing schedule.

Charming Boy was ill nearly every two weeks throughout the winter. Many of those illnesses required antibiotics to conquer. Most of his dietary supplements focused on improving his immune sytem (zinc, vitamin C, plus at least three other immune supplements).

Miracle Girl had a rough time with diet modification, especially in school with daily snacks brought in by rotating parents who are not always especially concerned with nutrition or appropriateness of snack choices (hello, chocolate-covered pretzels?!). She became a champ at swallowing pills, and learned to just down her smoothie-style supplment drinks with no complaints. I am really very proud of her for that. Most of her supplements focused on improving her volatile and socially-clueless behavior (providing neurotransmitter support).

Charming Boy still exhibits his same milk-allergy pattern, but his immune system is very strong now. He has been able to bounce back from illnesses (like croup and conjunctivitis) within two days with no antibiotics. This is a HUGE and welcome improvement in his health.

We have just finished another round of testing for Miracle Girl to see where she is at in terms of intestinal yeast overgrowth. There is evidence of a lingering stage 1 yeast overgrowth (the most mild form), despite all the diet changes and the long antifungal regimen. We will probably do one final antifungal round, then give most of the rest of it a break. She has tested negative for the celiac disease genes, so we feel comfortable in weaning her off the GFCF diet. We have held Tiny Boy back from reintegrating the foods until both kids could do it together (makes it so much easier that way).

Honestly, I had hoped to see a much greater improvement in my daughter’s behavioral issues. And some days are great. Maybe once a week we’ll have a really great day, and I recognize that as a clear improvement over basically never having a good day. However, I have dreams of having multiple good days strung together, with fewer outbursts and tantrums, more social awareness, and evidence of a general ability to focus and participate appropriately in the activites of a normal day. It does not feel like that is too much to ask for.

So, we have reached the end of the term I had promised my husband where we would re-evaluate the diet modification approach. It’s been nearly 10 months, and I am ready to wean the kids off almost everything. My sincerest admiration goes out to all parents who do this for a lifetime. It is fucking hard to follow 24/7, and you have to tailor your entire family life around it. We were lucky because our kids didn’t have anaphalactic reactions to these foods; I have friends who have to rush their child to the E.R. whenever she is exposed to even the tiniest amounts of gluten, egg, or dairy. For that distinction, I am grateful.

I feel a bit bitter that I followed this regimen so wholeheartedly and do not have clear results to show for it (for Miracle Girl; it obviously worked for Charming Boy). I am extremely grateful to our family who were so supportive of following the diet and dosing the supplements with us whenever we were together; toting bags and coolers of specialized foods and seeking out specialized grocery stores in nearby cities and states for trips where the kids went to stay with them; for scrutinizing menus and withholding some of the classic grandparent/kid destinations because there is nothing they could eat there; for being willing to learn and be supportive of our efforts, all in the interest of helping our kids.

My next step for Miracle Girl is to learn more about psychtropic drugs for people affected by ADHD. It runs in her genetic line, and it’s becoming clear that academically and socially she NEEDS something to help her focus and be able to reign herself in to participate in basic ways day to day. I have avoided this potential conclusion for at least two years. We will begin the ADHD evaluation process with our pediatrician. For every positive outcome I’ve spoken to a family about, I’ve also heard about the potential and serious negative side effects.

In one aspect, I look forward to a potential pharmaceutical trial. As a particularly astute friend put it, “popping one little pill every day has got to be easier than all the hours [and money] you put into the diet and supplements each week!” Probably a lot more affordable, too.

I wish it had not come to this point. but when I am completely honest with myself, I have to consider the “better living through chemistry” route, in case it is a step in that miraculous direction I’ve dreamt of for years.

End-of-year crazies

Written by tonya on May 27th, 2009

It seems like the end and beginning of each school year is just nuts. Lots of shortened days, which means I have to swizzle my work hours to pick up my girl on time. Way too many celebration and culmination activities (science fair, music night, talent show, end of year picnic– all crammed into two short weeks), and the air practically hums with my girl’s nervous energy. She churns over the unknown that the summer will bring, even though most of it will be similar to what she did last summer.

My work is also insane until at least July something-or-other, so I’m in coping mode. Heads down, just trying to “git ‘r done.” I’m sure my stress there does not help my girl be calmer, though I try very consciously to compartmentalize so it does not bleed over.

We are going to venture out in our hand-me-down RV that we’ve been slowly rehabbing all winter, taking our first real vacation since 2007. Three days camped by a river with wineries nearby. I am really looking forward to that trip!

Wish I’d had a clue about booking seaside camping a year in advance, but hopefully I’ll catch a break on that and be able to start planning for 2010, armed with the school calendar for 2009-2010. How insane does that sound? I’m not talking about a trip that requires a Visa to leave the country, just camping at the beach over the hill!

Open doors

Written by tonya on April 30th, 2009

When I returned to work in July, it was on a one-year contract. This was the only way I could work part-time. This contact was set to expire June 30.

My manager took a proposal forward to hire me on as a regular (the only part-time option I could hope for) and it didn’t get approved. Sign of the times, no new offers are being made this year, I’m told.

She then tried to get a longer-term contract in place, but it would not allow me to work part time, and there was no budget for it. I figured I would be unemployed again come July.

Yesterday, she called me in to say her up-line managers decided they could extend my contract for four months (pending HR approval). I was perplexed why this was not an option sooner, but I am so grateful for the chance to keep my job while we wait for the economy to pick up again. We’ll be going through the job offer song and dance routine again in August, but for now I know I can finally enroll my daughter in summer camp without worrying about losing the deposit money if we had to cancel the enrollment.

I believe things tend work out for the best. Sometimes I find it’s hard to keep that faith when doors keep closing. I’m happy to have the next six months to see what the future will bring.

Bullying

Written by tonya on April 21st, 2009

My daughter began getting bullied in school a few weeks ago. This is in first grade, by a girl in her class.

If you ever held the belief that girls were sugar, spice and everything nice, you’ve never spent much time around groups of girls older than 4 years. I swear, some of the controlling, power trip behaviors I saw coming out at that age were frightening! I thought we’d have until Jr. high before we had to think about that crap.

As for the bullying, we are glad that she goes to a zero-tolerance school. It is absolutely NOT okay in any form. EVER. The teacher has been helping coach both children, and I also met with my daughter and the other girl and her family a week ago to discuss what has been happening.

I think we were able to get some things out in the open, and set some agreements about behavior and expectations. It has been two days back at school since this meeting, and so far, so good. I really got a good feeling from the other family and have a lot of respect for how sensitively they helped to work things out.

The unfortunate thing I’ve seen is once you show kids your weak spot, more will jump on board. Today, she was bullied by four boys! Give me an effing break!!

I was constantly teased as a child, so I am hyper sensitive to this. It breaks my heart that she’s dealing with it, too. My hair was red (WAY before it became kewl to have red hair), and I was always the new kid because we moved a lot. My girl is pretty normal in nearly every other way, except she frequently doesn’t read social cues correctly and she is really sensitive. This makes it hard to develop and keep friendships.

I am hoping we can find ways to help her assert her worth and right for protection from such behaviors, and also learn to ignore the minor stuff. I never thought we’d have to deal with this kind of stuff in first grade.

Happy Wiister!

Written by tonya on April 13th, 2009

We had a nice weekend with family. Can you guess what the Easter Bunny brought? (I am not ashamed that I was definitely more excited than the kids!)

Sibling hug

Charming Boy closeup

Miracle Girl loooves her dress!

Miracle Girl loooved her dress!

Practicing Vanna

Channeling Vanna

Silly clowns

It’s more fun to clown around that smile for the camera….

Looking in the grass

Posing

"It's the Easter Bunny!"

“Mommy, it’s the Easter Bunny!!!”

He did not let go of his loot bag ALL DAY

He did not let go of his Easter loot ALL DAY!

Charming Boy

Happy Wiister!

Happy Wiister!

Other plans

Written by tonya on March 23rd, 2009

As motivated as I was to change blog platforms and revamp the image, I now find myself conversely and wholly uninspired. I hardly know where to start. I had been feeling for a while like I should shed the infertile/pregnancy loss skin, and needed to allow my online self to morph into a new existence. However, what I came up with is basically Mommy Blogger, and that just makes me cringe. Please bear with me as I evolve here, and find a way to be within the Internets that strikes a balance between the past, present and future me.

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Life in chez moi has been pretty dicey this past month. My girl has been hell on wheels. Six “and a half!” years old and already experimenting with full-on screaming, door-slamming tantrums. Oy! Charming Boy has been decidedly two, with “I DO IT!” his eternal catch phrase. Both have had hair-trigger tempers that flare with the slightest provocation. Between that and trying to justify my existence at work so I can get a more permanent job offer come June 30 when my current contact expires, I’ve been left frazzled and completely done in by the evening (my favorite time to blog).

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And if that were not enough, we were very much looking forward to a visit from my Mom this Friday, when Life intervened. Her father passed away suddenly yesterday afternoon. In the big picture it is a blessing, as his wish to not linger was granted quite expediently.

We have this odd karmic death thing going on, as twice before she’s newly arrived for a visit, only to have a major family member suddenly die and she both times needed to return home immediately. This time, the death was before her trip, so at least she is spared the yo-yo effect.

I am so saddened for her, as it was her last living parent and she will no longer be part of the “sandwich generation.” For me, I will miss the grandpa who gave me my red hair and was the last glue holding together the extended family via weekly Sunday lunches. The mantle passes to the next generation.

I have no living grandparents now, only my Mom and aunts and uncles. It makes me want to clutch them close and not let go; life as we know it is so very fleeting.

We are all evolving on many fronts. I will be heading to Wyoming for the funeral this week, and my dear husband will be holding down the fort with the various school pick ups and drop offs, and possibly an entire weekend with them all to himself (I am very grateful and proud of the grace with which he has made my trip back home possible).

I’ve said it before, and no doubt will again: “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” (Thank you, John Lennon.) May the Universe grant me the enlightenment to continue to boldly plan, yet bow to change when life turns me– and those I love– in other directions.

Car seat churn

Written by tonya on February 28th, 2009

Just fixed a problem with viewing posts and creating comments. Let me know if it works now, please. :)
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Have you heard that car seats expire? There is a guideline that you must replace child safety car seats every six to eight years (manufacturers can tell you the longevity for your seat). While I intellectually understand the reasons (plastics break down more quickly in the extreme environment of a car, harness straps wear out, safety labels fade, and therefore safety can be compromised– and I would ALWAYS choose the safety of my children over the “chance” it could be fine), my knee-jerk reaction was that it’s just another way to get us to shell out. Again. Probably it’s just that the seats I prefer (Britax) are hella expensive, though based on my experience with other brands, they are totally worth it. I (wrongly) assumed that I’d be using the same seat, barring any accidents (fingers crossed), for each of our kids.

I was surprised when I saw Britax has almost entirely new lineup of convertible seats. I had to start from scratch learning about the new models as I made comparisons.

The new Britax Advocate CS incorporates side airbags into the seat! That is a really intriguing choice for us, since 1999 Sienna has front airbags but no side airbags. The car seat’s airbags are not the igniting airbags you’re probably familiar with, but rather similar to air-filled rubber balloons that absorb side impact, and even help protect the passenger next to the carseat. They have been tested to be very effective. Supposedly available in February 2009, which should have been by… today. Harumph.

One attractive thing about buying a newly-released seat is that it won’t have been sitting around on a retailer’s shelf for 12 months, reducing the useful lifespan (I just saw a Marathon on sale on Amazon for $200, but who knows how old it really is?) And with Charming Boy just hitting a whopping 24 pounds on a 34.5″ frame at 32 months old, let’s face it: he’s gonna need one of these for a LONG time.

I’m curious if you’ve heard of them? We currently have a Roundabout (two years left) and a Marathon (expiring), and I’m trying to decide if the Advocate or the Boulevard is the better choice for us. Do you have any opinions, knowledge, or experience with this?

A fresh start

Written by tonya on February 21st, 2009

Thank you for your thoughts regarding hubby’s grandparents. We keep on plugging along, as does my mom-in-law who is coping fairly well despite the outrageous circumstances.



With so much change, it only seemed fitting to try on a new look, as well as run amok with new blogging software.

I appreciate your patience as I iron out a few wrinkles (and welcome your feedback if you spot something amiss).